If you and your former spouse have children, you are probably trying to figure out how to best co-parent them effectively. Given how tense and hostile the divorce process can be, you might still have some lingering resentments and wounded feelings, which can make co-parenting a serious challenge. However, it is in your children’s best interests that you set these feelings aside and focus on their needs and wellbeing. We compiled some tips to set you on the right path.
Co-Parenting as a Team
You do not need to be best friends with your former spouse to effectively work together as a co-parenting team. The key to co-parenting after a divorce is setting aside your differences and unresolved issues, so you can focus on your children. If you are having a difficult time accomplishing this, consider seeking another outlet, such as a therapist or trusted friend, to discuss your feelings.
Consider the following co-parenting tips:
- Do not put your children in the middle of a situation: Your children should not relay messages to you or your former spouse and you should never badmouth your co-parent in front of them. Doing so can increase their stress levels and make them feel as though they have to choose between parents.
- Learn how to communicate: If you always seem to argue when you meet in-person, consider finding another way to communicate with each other. If you co-parent more effectively over the phone, you should utilize this option more in the interest of avoiding conflict. Find out what works best for you and stick to it.
- Collaborate on consistent routines and rules: Your children will have two separate households in the aftermath of the divorce, but that does not mean they should not have consistent routines and rules. Work with your co-parent to create some consistent rules and routines for your children. Otherwise, vastly different household rules will create some confusion and make them feel insecure and frustrated.
- Learn how to resolve arguments: Even the healthiest marriages involve arguments, so you cannot expect to agree all the time as divorced co-parents. To smoothly navigate them, however, you must learn how to resolve these problems. Listen carefully to each other, try not to worry about minor issues, and open up your mind to compromise.
You and your former spouse will likely encounter some hurdles along the way, but as long as you are both willing to put in the effort, you can find a way to learn how to work as a team.
Reach Out to a Knowledgeable Family Law Attorney!
Co-parenting after a divorce is a trying experience for some. If you feel the issues you are encountering are too great to handle on your own, reach out to the team at William Kirby, Family Law Attorney for the skilled legal guidance you need to overcome them. Our family law attorney has the compassion and experience necessary to guide you through even the most complex legal matters, including child custody.
Get started on your case today and contact our law office at (215) 515-9901 to set up an initial consultation with our trusted attorney.